This is absolutely the most amazing man in the world. With everything he has going on in his life, he takes the time to try to make sure that I am doing okay. I'm not, but at least he tries to make things as well as they can get for me. A year is a long time. Everyone says a year isn't that long. In the grand scheme of life, maybe a year is just a drop in the bucket. But when you are a new couple, just starting out a year is forever.
My loving husband worried before he left. I asked him what was worrying him the most. He told me he was worried that I would decide that I couldn't take a year with him being gone. That I would leave and not tell him where I went to.
With everything that he should have worrying him at this time, he is worried I can't handle his being gone. I know I have not been handling it well. But the very last thing on my mind is going anywhere without the other half of my heart. Our lives were joined from the moment that we met. From that time on he had my heart in his hands. I want nothing more than to spend every moment that I can with him for however long I have left on this earth.
Life doesn't get any better than it has been since Jon has been in my life. After many years searching for the right man that I was meant to be with, I found him at a small park in a little town. I no longer have any doubts about where my life is meant to be. I know that I am meant to be Jon's wife. I know that deep in my soul.
Being without him for this year will be hell on earth. But I will survive it, because that is what is meant to be. Jon will come home, and we will live our lives together until I take my last breath. Jon is what makes my life worth living. He knows how to make me smile when all I want to do is curl up in a ball and cry. He knows the things he can say that melts my heart and makes me a big puddle of tears. He knows what not to say when I can't take hearing them. He also knows, that I never want to be left in the dark.
He tells me what he can without putting me at risk. The rest, well it is something I understand. There will be times that he can't tell me things. I understand that and wouldn't ask him to jeopardize his or any other soldiers lives. I won't ask him to share anything that could put his or anyone else's life on the line.
My dear Jon,
I love you so very much. I hated to see you leave, but I knew that you had to. I need for you to stay safe love. I know you will do all you can to hold to your promise. I'm sorry I was such a wreck. I guess I just needed a good cry. I promise every day you are away won't be as bad for me as the one's since you went away. I promise I will do better.
As for that question you asked me; I would never dream of being anywhere without you. I will be waiting for your return with open arms love.
Until I see you again,
Your wife,
Betty
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