As 2011 rolls to a close, I have been thinking and over-thinking what this year has meant to my life. I'm not one that usually thinks to much about a year closing and another beginning. For the most part each year just seems another year closer to my kids being grown, and my getting still older than I am. I guess you could say that I am a pessimist.
This year however, I have had so many things change. Some of which I am so extremely grateful for, others I could have done without. I'm not really one for lists either; so I won't bore anyone with a list of top ten or bottom ten. Most of you here reading this blog will already know my top and bottom of my "list".
Meeting Jon was absolutely the top of my list of amazing changes for the year. I know having Jon in my life will forever be the number one blessing every year for the rest of my life. He has given my life so many things. You never know how empty your life really is until you meet that one person that fills your life to an over flowing fountain. Life never seemed to give me a break. I learned this year from meeting Jon that it wasn't life that was short changing me, it was me. Jon has this way of making me see that life can't screw with you unless you let it.
Showing posts with label twins. Show all posts
Showing posts with label twins. Show all posts
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Monday, November 21, 2011
Monday Nov. 21st, 2011
The days just seem to keep getting harder instead of easier. I don't know how much more I can take right now. My nerves are shot. My heart can't take much more heartache. Each day that moves me forward also seems to knock me back a few steps. When does it start to get easier?
This morning started out about normal. I knew that I had a doctors appointment today so I got ready and left. The doctor that I went to see was my old doctor. I was supposed to see a new lady but she was called out of the office so my old doctor took my appointment time for her.
The lab tests came back on twin B today. Unfortunately there wasn't much that the test proved. They proved that there was no abnormal defects in little Haylee. The tests couldn't determine what caused her heart to stop or if it had stopped prior to the miscarriage. There was no reason physically for the miscarriage to have happened.
This morning started out about normal. I knew that I had a doctors appointment today so I got ready and left. The doctor that I went to see was my old doctor. I was supposed to see a new lady but she was called out of the office so my old doctor took my appointment time for her.
The lab tests came back on twin B today. Unfortunately there wasn't much that the test proved. They proved that there was no abnormal defects in little Haylee. The tests couldn't determine what caused her heart to stop or if it had stopped prior to the miscarriage. There was no reason physically for the miscarriage to have happened.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Thursday Nov. 17th, 2011
Being the wife of a soldier is a long and difficult road. It's a life full of uncertainty, fears, sadness, and loneliness. One minute you are so happy to be hearing your soldiers voice and in the next instant you are in tears because he has to say "later".
In my family we don't say goodbye at the end of our communications. Goodbye is too final. So instead we just say later, or we'll talk later. For me it's because I can't say goodbye. Goodbye means there isn't a later.
When my sweet Jon had to go for his training times, I refused to say goodbye. I felt like if I did use that word, that I wouldn't see Jon again. I explained one night to Jon that I just couldn't say bye. Since then we say later every time we are about to leave the conversation.
I count myself as a lucky wife. Jon has had contact with me every day since he has been gone except one. He would have that day but it was a day of travel. Not every soldier is able to stay in communication with their loved one as often as others.
I know that we too will have days and weeks without communications. Those are the days of this deployment that I do not look forward to. How does a wife get through the not knowing and being scared every time that the phone rings or there's a knock at the door? I don't know but I do know that we get through it somehow. We have to right, if we didn't there wouldn't be so many wives of soldiers.
I know I am not the only woman that is going through these same emotions right now. I know I'm not the first to have to deal with a deployment. Hell there are women that have gone through many many deployments with their loved ones. They are very strong women, because I don't know that I could handle more than one.
I believe that God only gives us what we can handle, but I also believe that God tests how much we can handle. I have been tested many times, I guess I have handled more than I thought was possible. God brought Jon into my life, there is NO other way to explain it. Yes we were in the right place at the right time. But who brought us there at that time in that place?
I don't believe that God would have brought Jon into my life and our daughters lives only to take him away from us so soon. So with that in mind, I know that God is going to bring Jon home to us as well.
I don't normally go into discussion about how I feel regarding God or other religious beliefs. And I apologize now if anyone takes offense to my blog post today. To get me through this deployment I have to believe in a higher power. I have to believe that someone is watching over our troops, keeping them safe.
As the Holidays are getting closer and Jon and other troops are getting more involved in their duties, we stop to remember that we will not always be able to have contact but it only means he is busy with his job. We stop and remember to be thankful for what we have now, we have our family; we have our freedom. We have freedom thanks to our troops that sacrifice their comfort, their family time, and for far too many, their lives.
My family and I will not forget the many sacrifices that are made every day to protect our freedom. We will remember that freedom isn't free, it's paid for by men and women that sacrifice every day. We will keep in our prayers not only our troops but, their families and loved ones that also sacrifice every day.
To all of the men and women both overseas and here at home, thank you from my family to yours for what you give to us every day. The freedom to sit and worry about our loved ones that are giving yet another family their freedom.
My loving husband,
Thank you my love. I know what you have sacrificed to be where you are doing what you are doing. You and every troop member there, have my appreciation and my gratitude. You are all over there protecting our daughters rights and their freedom. For that love, you have my undying love.
I won't lie and say it's not hard to have you away from us. That would be a huge lie. I will say though that no matter how hard it is, we will survive this deployment together. There isn't anything that we can not overcome, as long as we face it together.
I know having a family has been a new change. It's also what will bring you home. I hope that in some small way, you can feel our love for you from there. Thank you love, for everything you have so unselfishly given the girls and I. You gave us the one thing all four of us needed, love. I can tell you that we have felt that love every second since you gave it.
I love you my love,
Later,
Betty
In my family we don't say goodbye at the end of our communications. Goodbye is too final. So instead we just say later, or we'll talk later. For me it's because I can't say goodbye. Goodbye means there isn't a later.
When my sweet Jon had to go for his training times, I refused to say goodbye. I felt like if I did use that word, that I wouldn't see Jon again. I explained one night to Jon that I just couldn't say bye. Since then we say later every time we are about to leave the conversation.
I count myself as a lucky wife. Jon has had contact with me every day since he has been gone except one. He would have that day but it was a day of travel. Not every soldier is able to stay in communication with their loved one as often as others.
I know that we too will have days and weeks without communications. Those are the days of this deployment that I do not look forward to. How does a wife get through the not knowing and being scared every time that the phone rings or there's a knock at the door? I don't know but I do know that we get through it somehow. We have to right, if we didn't there wouldn't be so many wives of soldiers.
I know I am not the only woman that is going through these same emotions right now. I know I'm not the first to have to deal with a deployment. Hell there are women that have gone through many many deployments with their loved ones. They are very strong women, because I don't know that I could handle more than one.
I believe that God only gives us what we can handle, but I also believe that God tests how much we can handle. I have been tested many times, I guess I have handled more than I thought was possible. God brought Jon into my life, there is NO other way to explain it. Yes we were in the right place at the right time. But who brought us there at that time in that place?
I don't believe that God would have brought Jon into my life and our daughters lives only to take him away from us so soon. So with that in mind, I know that God is going to bring Jon home to us as well.
I don't normally go into discussion about how I feel regarding God or other religious beliefs. And I apologize now if anyone takes offense to my blog post today. To get me through this deployment I have to believe in a higher power. I have to believe that someone is watching over our troops, keeping them safe.
As the Holidays are getting closer and Jon and other troops are getting more involved in their duties, we stop to remember that we will not always be able to have contact but it only means he is busy with his job. We stop and remember to be thankful for what we have now, we have our family; we have our freedom. We have freedom thanks to our troops that sacrifice their comfort, their family time, and for far too many, their lives.
My family and I will not forget the many sacrifices that are made every day to protect our freedom. We will remember that freedom isn't free, it's paid for by men and women that sacrifice every day. We will keep in our prayers not only our troops but, their families and loved ones that also sacrifice every day.
To all of the men and women both overseas and here at home, thank you from my family to yours for what you give to us every day. The freedom to sit and worry about our loved ones that are giving yet another family their freedom.
My loving husband,
Thank you my love. I know what you have sacrificed to be where you are doing what you are doing. You and every troop member there, have my appreciation and my gratitude. You are all over there protecting our daughters rights and their freedom. For that love, you have my undying love.
I won't lie and say it's not hard to have you away from us. That would be a huge lie. I will say though that no matter how hard it is, we will survive this deployment together. There isn't anything that we can not overcome, as long as we face it together.
I know having a family has been a new change. It's also what will bring you home. I hope that in some small way, you can feel our love for you from there. Thank you love, for everything you have so unselfishly given the girls and I. You gave us the one thing all four of us needed, love. I can tell you that we have felt that love every second since you gave it.
I love you my love,
Later,
Betty
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Tuesday Nov 15th, 2011
I took the day off from blogging yesterday. I needed the day to myself. I spent the day unpacking from my recent trip, getting laundry done, and just having time to sit back and think. It was a long day. It was one of those days that had Jon been here with me I would have felt so much better.I did get a lot done though, and spent time to myself which I badly needed.
Today was not such a great day though. I had a lot of things I had to get accomplished. I managed to get everything that was of importance finished. My last stop for today took a lot out of me. There was a lady in the place that was holding a small baby. Someone asked her how old the baby was, one week old born last Monday. I was standing there listening in a strange way. I started bawling when she said that her daughter Annisa was born on Monday.I grabbed what I was there to get and ran out of the building.
I don't know how I am supposed to live with the fact that my babies won't ever get the chance to be born. I won't ever get the chance to proudly tell people that the twins are a week old, or how much they weighed. I won't ever get the chance to see Jon talking to them or playing with them.
I feel like an idiot for running from the store the way I did, at the time I couldn't get out of there fast enough. It's been just over a week ago now that I lost our babies, it's not getting any easier. I have moments where it doesn't cross my mind, then all of a sudden something makes it hit me. I'm tired of the pain every day, every minute of the day.
I'm tired of having to be so strong when all I want to do is have my breakdown. All I want to do is have my babies back where they are supposed to be right now, growing inside of me until their birth date. My sweet Jon was supposed to try to get his leave for the births. We had so many things we were going to do during his leave. Now it just seems like there isn't really a reason to take the leave. Of course there's the fact that I will get to see him for a short time, which is awesome in itself. Only then, I will once again have to let go for him to finish his time away.
Why in the good lord's name can't he just be allowed to come home? Our children died, Jon is needed at home. I need him here with me, I don't know how to get through any of this without him. I know he is doing what he has to do. I know he has no choice but to be there. I know if he could be he would be here at home right now. That makes it even harder to deal with this, because I know he is worried about me. I don't want to make his job harder on him. This situation is hard enough on both of us without him feeling bad about not being able to be here.
I don't blame him for not being here, I blame bad timing and my body for letting me down. I blame myself for not being woman enough to carry our babies to term. Jon keeps apologizing to me, it's so not his fault. It's mine. It was my body that rejected the twins, it was me that couldn't do what as a woman I was made to do.
Enough of this for now, I need a good long cry right now.
Betty
Today was not such a great day though. I had a lot of things I had to get accomplished. I managed to get everything that was of importance finished. My last stop for today took a lot out of me. There was a lady in the place that was holding a small baby. Someone asked her how old the baby was, one week old born last Monday. I was standing there listening in a strange way. I started bawling when she said that her daughter Annisa was born on Monday.I grabbed what I was there to get and ran out of the building.
I don't know how I am supposed to live with the fact that my babies won't ever get the chance to be born. I won't ever get the chance to proudly tell people that the twins are a week old, or how much they weighed. I won't ever get the chance to see Jon talking to them or playing with them.
I feel like an idiot for running from the store the way I did, at the time I couldn't get out of there fast enough. It's been just over a week ago now that I lost our babies, it's not getting any easier. I have moments where it doesn't cross my mind, then all of a sudden something makes it hit me. I'm tired of the pain every day, every minute of the day.
I'm tired of having to be so strong when all I want to do is have my breakdown. All I want to do is have my babies back where they are supposed to be right now, growing inside of me until their birth date. My sweet Jon was supposed to try to get his leave for the births. We had so many things we were going to do during his leave. Now it just seems like there isn't really a reason to take the leave. Of course there's the fact that I will get to see him for a short time, which is awesome in itself. Only then, I will once again have to let go for him to finish his time away.
Why in the good lord's name can't he just be allowed to come home? Our children died, Jon is needed at home. I need him here with me, I don't know how to get through any of this without him. I know he is doing what he has to do. I know he has no choice but to be there. I know if he could be he would be here at home right now. That makes it even harder to deal with this, because I know he is worried about me. I don't want to make his job harder on him. This situation is hard enough on both of us without him feeling bad about not being able to be here.
I don't blame him for not being here, I blame bad timing and my body for letting me down. I blame myself for not being woman enough to carry our babies to term. Jon keeps apologizing to me, it's so not his fault. It's mine. It was my body that rejected the twins, it was me that couldn't do what as a woman I was made to do.
Enough of this for now, I need a good long cry right now.
Betty
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Saturday Nov. 12th, 2011
I feel like I am losing my mind. All I do is sit here on my bed crying all day and night. I sleep only when I am so exhausted that I can't keep my eyes open anymore. All I think about is Jon being gone and my babies deaths. I wake up from sleep seeing the pictures of those little babies in my head. I don't want to see those anymore. No matter what I try to think about, the only thing that stays in my head is my first baby and how little he/she was. And the fact that my second little baby had no heartbeat left and was nothing bigger than a large blood clot.
Those pictures just won't go away. I keep replaying all day long how I lost them and how the nurse picked up the first baby and ran inside. I can't stop crying. I don't want to talk to any one, I just want to be by myself. Every time some one talks to me I just feel like punching them out. I'm sick of people asking if I'm okay. No I'm not okay, I'm heartbroken and I feel like I died inside.
I'm sick to death of everyone looking at me like I've got the plague. I know they are upset about me losing the babies. They were MY babies, no one gets the fact that I just had two babies die. Not only did they die but, they died a horrible death. They didn't deserve to be ripped out of me that way. They deserved to live, they had the right to be born. They had the right to grow up to be something special. they deserved to be loved and cared for.
I know people think they are helping me to not think about the twins. In reality though, they are making it that much harder. Those pictures in my head won't leave, they are there eating away at what is left of my sanity. The bad part is I can feel myself slipping further into this black hole that won't let me out. Truth be told, the black space lets me have one thing, silence.
I sit here in my room, thinking about the babies almost every second in one way or another. Some thoughts are about the babies and Jon. Like why Jon has to pay for me being a failure. Or how terrific Jon would have been as a daddy.
I need to know if we were having boys or girls. I need to be able to try to put names to those tiny little babies. Was the first one I lost outside the hospital Jonathan Jr or was it Haylee Dawn? Which one of my sweet babies did I lose right there as I was walking up to the hospital?
Over and over again all I see is my poor helpless babies being ripped out of me like they were some foreign thing invading a foreign country. Why did that have to happen to them? Why did my body reject those innocent babies? Why will Jon and I never be able to hold our precious bundles like we should have been able to?
Why can't I do just this one thing right? Why does it feel like I am slipping further into that black hole that I can't get out of? Why do I even care if I can get out of it? Why can't I have my babies back? Why do I have to go through all of this alone? Why can't Jon be here with me right now? Why am I being so selfish? Jon has a job to do I know that, but damn it I NEED him here. I do need him, Jon keeps me sane. Right now he is the only one that can even come close to understanding what I am going through. He lost those babies just as I did.
It's not fair that I have to face this all alone here. It's not fair that Jon is facing all of this alone overseas. None of this is fair. I wish I could fall asleep and wake up to last week. A time when my babies were safely tucked in my tummy where they belong. A time when I was laying in Jon's arms where I belong. A time when everything was right in my world.
Why do I have to go through this again? Alone. Yes I have my girls around and Jon's parents too. As much as they all want to help me through this, they can't even begin to understand. I love them I really do but, I need Jon.
Those pictures just won't go away. I keep replaying all day long how I lost them and how the nurse picked up the first baby and ran inside. I can't stop crying. I don't want to talk to any one, I just want to be by myself. Every time some one talks to me I just feel like punching them out. I'm sick of people asking if I'm okay. No I'm not okay, I'm heartbroken and I feel like I died inside.
I'm sick to death of everyone looking at me like I've got the plague. I know they are upset about me losing the babies. They were MY babies, no one gets the fact that I just had two babies die. Not only did they die but, they died a horrible death. They didn't deserve to be ripped out of me that way. They deserved to live, they had the right to be born. They had the right to grow up to be something special. they deserved to be loved and cared for.
I know people think they are helping me to not think about the twins. In reality though, they are making it that much harder. Those pictures in my head won't leave, they are there eating away at what is left of my sanity. The bad part is I can feel myself slipping further into this black hole that won't let me out. Truth be told, the black space lets me have one thing, silence.
I sit here in my room, thinking about the babies almost every second in one way or another. Some thoughts are about the babies and Jon. Like why Jon has to pay for me being a failure. Or how terrific Jon would have been as a daddy.
I need to know if we were having boys or girls. I need to be able to try to put names to those tiny little babies. Was the first one I lost outside the hospital Jonathan Jr or was it Haylee Dawn? Which one of my sweet babies did I lose right there as I was walking up to the hospital?
Over and over again all I see is my poor helpless babies being ripped out of me like they were some foreign thing invading a foreign country. Why did that have to happen to them? Why did my body reject those innocent babies? Why will Jon and I never be able to hold our precious bundles like we should have been able to?
Why can't I do just this one thing right? Why does it feel like I am slipping further into that black hole that I can't get out of? Why do I even care if I can get out of it? Why can't I have my babies back? Why do I have to go through all of this alone? Why can't Jon be here with me right now? Why am I being so selfish? Jon has a job to do I know that, but damn it I NEED him here. I do need him, Jon keeps me sane. Right now he is the only one that can even come close to understanding what I am going through. He lost those babies just as I did.
It's not fair that I have to face this all alone here. It's not fair that Jon is facing all of this alone overseas. None of this is fair. I wish I could fall asleep and wake up to last week. A time when my babies were safely tucked in my tummy where they belong. A time when I was laying in Jon's arms where I belong. A time when everything was right in my world.
Why do I have to go through this again? Alone. Yes I have my girls around and Jon's parents too. As much as they all want to help me through this, they can't even begin to understand. I love them I really do but, I need Jon.
Monday, November 7, 2011
Monday Nov. 7th, 2011
Short night tonight.
Today has been the worst day of my life. This morning after 11 weeks of being so happy to be blessed with twins, I lost both babies. I woke up to heavy cramping and bleeding. It was the worst feeling ever. I don't know what happened. I was more careful than I have ever been while pregnant.
This evening I had the horrible job of telling Jon that I had failed as a pregnant mom. How do you tell someone something that you know is going to break their heart? Especially when that person is thousands of miles away. There was no easy way of telling him. My heart feels like it was blown up. I know that Jon is worried about me, I'm not handling this miscarriage very well. I'm more scared for Jon now though. He is having to deal with the news while he is way away from home.
I know that this is killing him inside because he wanted those babies so much. He was ecstatic from the day we found out I was pregnant. When we found out twins, he was so excited. And now, I had to break his heart. How do I live with that? I failed at one of the simplest things in the world, carrying babies to term. Why does this happen? In today's technological world, why do miscarriages still happen? Why can't they be prevented? Why do parents have to go through this? Why does this keep happening to me?
All I ever wanted was to be a mom. After I had my first daughter, all I wanted left in the world was to have a son. I have four wonderful daughters now. I am blessed I know.I would have given anything to have had a son. Now though, I can not go through one more heartbreak. I can not put myself in a place that this can happen again. Part of me dies every time. I don't have many more parts left. My heart is tired of pain. I don't want to go through this again.
Jon,
I'm sorry. I promise I tried to be very careful. I wanted our babies. I would have given anything not to have had to put you through this. I'm so sorry. I didn't want to tell you while you were there. But how could I not tell you? I'm sorry I let you down. I'm sorry I let the family down. But I'm even more sorry that there are two little babies that won't get to know what its like to have you love them.
I'm sorry
Today has been the worst day of my life. This morning after 11 weeks of being so happy to be blessed with twins, I lost both babies. I woke up to heavy cramping and bleeding. It was the worst feeling ever. I don't know what happened. I was more careful than I have ever been while pregnant.
This evening I had the horrible job of telling Jon that I had failed as a pregnant mom. How do you tell someone something that you know is going to break their heart? Especially when that person is thousands of miles away. There was no easy way of telling him. My heart feels like it was blown up. I know that Jon is worried about me, I'm not handling this miscarriage very well. I'm more scared for Jon now though. He is having to deal with the news while he is way away from home.
I know that this is killing him inside because he wanted those babies so much. He was ecstatic from the day we found out I was pregnant. When we found out twins, he was so excited. And now, I had to break his heart. How do I live with that? I failed at one of the simplest things in the world, carrying babies to term. Why does this happen? In today's technological world, why do miscarriages still happen? Why can't they be prevented? Why do parents have to go through this? Why does this keep happening to me?
All I ever wanted was to be a mom. After I had my first daughter, all I wanted left in the world was to have a son. I have four wonderful daughters now. I am blessed I know.I would have given anything to have had a son. Now though, I can not go through one more heartbreak. I can not put myself in a place that this can happen again. Part of me dies every time. I don't have many more parts left. My heart is tired of pain. I don't want to go through this again.
Jon,
I'm sorry. I promise I tried to be very careful. I wanted our babies. I would have given anything not to have had to put you through this. I'm so sorry. I didn't want to tell you while you were there. But how could I not tell you? I'm sorry I let you down. I'm sorry I let the family down. But I'm even more sorry that there are two little babies that won't get to know what its like to have you love them.
I'm sorry
Monday, October 24, 2011
Monday Oct. 24th, 2011
Well tonight is a short night. Mainly because I have a ton of things to do tomorrow.
Today was doctor day. It went great! The dr. is happy with how well the babies are growing. And the fact that I am still carrying them well, he is so thrilled. Of course he isn't nearly as thrilled as Jon and I are. We are truly being blessed with these babies. So tomorrow is a long day. I won't be posting here for a couple of weeks, but as soon as I can I will be back to posting daily again. I have a lot of things to get accomplished in the next two weeks. The girls school work is getting busy with a lot to do.
With their novels getting ready to get written starting on the first of November, we will be working very hard to get novels written and completed in just 30 days.
Like I said the doctor said that things are going well. I'll see him again in two weeks, then a month after that. OH yeah! We have a date for babies birth date. They are going to be born April 21st of 2012! We are so super excited. New baby bump pics are up!
Jon,
Thank you for this blessing that you have given me and our family. I never thought I would have more kids let alone two at a time. To say that I am happy is wrong, I am ecstatic beyond belief. You have made my life so much fuller since you came into it. I love you with all my heart love. Baby bump pics up on the pic page love.
Betty
Today was doctor day. It went great! The dr. is happy with how well the babies are growing. And the fact that I am still carrying them well, he is so thrilled. Of course he isn't nearly as thrilled as Jon and I are. We are truly being blessed with these babies. So tomorrow is a long day. I won't be posting here for a couple of weeks, but as soon as I can I will be back to posting daily again. I have a lot of things to get accomplished in the next two weeks. The girls school work is getting busy with a lot to do.
With their novels getting ready to get written starting on the first of November, we will be working very hard to get novels written and completed in just 30 days.
Like I said the doctor said that things are going well. I'll see him again in two weeks, then a month after that. OH yeah! We have a date for babies birth date. They are going to be born April 21st of 2012! We are so super excited. New baby bump pics are up!
Jon,
Thank you for this blessing that you have given me and our family. I never thought I would have more kids let alone two at a time. To say that I am happy is wrong, I am ecstatic beyond belief. You have made my life so much fuller since you came into it. I love you with all my heart love. Baby bump pics up on the pic page love.
Betty
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Saturday Oct. 22nd, 2011
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| Bear used with permission from www.creddy.at |
Well, today has been a long day. Boring in every way. I haven't done much. I got a few programs installed on our desktop for the girls. Rose has been having fun playing with Paint Shop Pro today. The image above was done using PSP as well. I love those cute little bears.
I have been a PSPaholic for going on eight years now. I can remember a time before people on the net thought much about copyright. In PSP groups back then no one bothered putting the copyright information on their tags. I was around for the big change, when everyone started becoming more aware and using the © info on their tags. I was there when a lot of artists started going to Pay to Use (PTU).
I watched companies form and fade away that helped artists to keep their images safe. A lot of things have changed over the years in image creation on the net. I used to have so much fun with creating these tags. I stopped about two years ago when life just got to hectic. Now that things have slowed down, I am once again having fun with it.
The groups of the day (MSN groups) have been gone a few years now. You don't see the numbers of members in groups on other sites as what MSN groups had. I do miss my old group buddies. We hung out online all the time back then. We all learned PSP tricks together. We learned the © ins and out at the same time together.
It's fun working with Rose now teaching her what I learned all those years back when I started PSP. Lea and Boo now want to learn as well. Guess what? I feel a nice long art class coming up! Well, I have yet another blog to get to, and more playing in PSP. So I am cutting this post short tonight.
Jon,
I'm getting so excited! I can't wait to be able to see you again. There are so many things that I would love to talk to you about. I know though when I see you, talking will be the furthest from my mind. I just want to curl up next to you and listen to your heart beating. I love you my love.
Betty
Friday, October 21, 2011
Friday Oct. 21st, 2011
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| 10-21-11 |
Well it has been exactly 7 days since the last baby bump pics. See how big I have gotten in just a week? The twins are the size of a green olive (1 inch long) right now. Between the fluid and them, I don't know how much room there is going to be here at the momma hotel. Today I have had the normal stretching pains that go along with pregnancy. It feels like they are trying to tear their way out already. Of course it's just everything stretching to make room for them.
So today has been a pretty boring day. Grandpa and I were busy today working on the front porch. We finally have all the plastic up and the door made and hung. The only thing left for tomorrow is to put the plastic on the door. Then it will all be finished. It looks a lot better now that its done. It's also a lot warmer on the porch. The kitten doesn't know what to think about being trapped on the porch though.
Jon has been a busy man again today. I know that part of it is that it is getting so close to time he will have to be away. Part of it is that they are working him to death.
Oh the speech that Obama gave this morning about bringing troops from Iraq home by the end of December? Every one I know had to call or text me to tell me that Jon may not be going overseas after all. Hello? Uh, did you ALL forget that he is going to Afghanistan? I know to us here it is all one in the same country right? No it isn't. I wish half of them would have remembered what I told them. Don't believe anything that you hear on the news regarding the troops. If you want to know if something that was said is true, wait I'll know if it is. Thankfully I have those that keep me as up to date as they can.
Jon tries to make sure I have some clue as to what is going on, for the things that he is able to share with me anyway. The FRG (Family Readiness Group) does their best to keep mom and I informed as well. Trust me when I say that if Jon were going to becoming back home instead of going overseas; he most certainly would let me know.
Now don't take all that wrong, I love each of you that called and texted to try to give me good news. I do appreciate it, but please know that while Jon is overseas I really don't want to know what Obama is saying about the troops. I don't believe half what that man says regarding our service men and women. He usually only tells the public what he thinks they want to hear. he doesn't tell you that when he says he is bringing 30,000 troops home; that he is also sending 30,000 more over there to replace those coming home.
Really I don't need the stress right now of Obama's lies. When Jon is going to come home, he or the FRG will tell me. I just can't get my hopes up every time our government says they are coming home. Thank you all for wanting to give me good news though. Right now the only good news I will be getting, is when Jon calls and says baby I'm coming home. I live for that call.
Jon my love,
Don't forget to take a look at the baby bump page. Can you believe it? That is after only one week! Yep I'm screwed. LOL In a good way, but still screwed. I love you baby and I miss you more than you can know. Hurry home safe and sound.
Betty
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Thursday Oct. 20th, 2011
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| Jon being himself. |
This is one of the many things that I love so much about Jon. He can just relax and be a kid at heart. He doesn't sweat the small stuff like so many other adults do. He knows how to sit back and enjoy life. I love that about him. There are times when it gets a little on the annoying side, like when I am trying to have a serious conversation with him. But for the most part, it's a refreshing change of pace.
Today has been one of those days where I haven't been able to get my energy level up. I went to bed super late. I woke up really late too. Once I finally rolled out of bed, I couldn't seem to get any motivation to do anything. By three I was ready to take a nap, but didn't. Here it is now shortly before seven and I have eaten dinner. I'm now totally exhausted but know that by ten or eleven tonight; I will finally have woken up. Then it will be a super late night yet again.
Oh the life of a night owl. It's great staying up late for me because the house gets really quiet and I have time to think. It's the time I use to be able to talk to Jon. I know he isn't here to listen to what I have to say, but in a way he is. He lets me talk without interruptions since he isn't here. I don't mean that as if he interrupts me when he is here. What I mean is, I can talk to him while he is gone and I can get everything I want to say out. I don't have someone yelling for Jon at the other end of the house. Most of the time, people pretty much leave me to myself. The girls included in that.
I get to sit and think, or work on my blogs. Sometimes I use my time to just sit and think about where my life has turned over the last few months. Trust me when I say my life has never been better. Honestly half the time I can't believe how much life has gotten so amazing. I never would have dreamed that life could ever be so fulfilling. It is truly an awesome feeling.
Today Jon has been really busy at work. I knew that he would be today, so I have left him alone. He called for a short minute or two this afternoon. He just wanted to check on me since I hadn't texted him all day. I just didn't want to get on his nerves as he was working.
I can't believe that my trip is coming so quickly. I still have a lot to get finished. It seems like I am packing to move, not go on vacation. Yes we women are bad about taking too much when we travel. Really though, I am only taking the things I have to take. Plus the things that he asked me to bring with me. Right now I have two bags packed into a third bag so that I only have one to carry. It however is very heavy so I may not do it that way after all. On top of my two bags inside that one, I also have a camera bag and tripod to take videos of Jon talking to our kids. I also have his cowboy boots and him a change of clothes as well. I can't forget that I also have to bring his cowboy hat. Yep I love it when he dresses as a cowboy for me, he fits that part well.
I haven't packed my shoes yet ( two pair are going in the bag with everything else) plus I have the dress I want Jon to see me in that first day still hanging up. So I have quite a bit to finish getting ready. Oh and I can't forget the external hard drive and the laptop. I'm going to need an extra six months just to make sure I have everything ready in time.
I hate packing, and other than to move I have never needed to pack for a trip. So this is new for me. The train ride is going to be new for me as well as leaving my girls behind while I go on this trip. I know they will be taken care of though. If I didn't know that I wouldn't leave them here. Grandma and grandpa are great with the girls though so I know they are in good hands.
Well, I guess I should end this blog post for now so that I can finish getting things ready. Problem is, I have no energy to get anything done tonight. Oh well, it won't hurt to wait a day or more LOL.
Jon,
Before much longer I will be back in your arms again curled up next to you. I will be able to feel your heart beating next to mine. I will be able to feel your breath against my skin. I will continue to look forward to the day when I can hold you in my arms and know that you won't be leaving again. Until then my love, be safe and well.
I love you,
Betty
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Wednesday Oct 19th, 2011
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| My sweet Jon and his mom. |
This photo was also taken by our daughters. It was taken the day of Jon's Deployment Ceremony. I love this picture because it is one of the very few that we have of the two of them together. Jon actually smiled without it being a goofy one. Mom looks so happy.
Today was a pretty boring day. I woke up to a strange set of messages from Jon. I think that he was half asleep as he was texting me. I texted him back with a good morning. He called just a few minutes later. I love talking to Jon, and we always find a lot of interesting things to talk about. His buddies think it's strange that we can sit on the phone talking for hours at a time. I don't think it's weird. We love one another and enjoy talking. We also learn new things about each other all the time.
The girls are having a fun time getting their characters down for their upcoming novels. Today they worked on the supporting characters. They now have their supporting players and the main characters too. Tomorrow they get to work on the villain's in their stories.
Well, tonight is a short post night. I have another story to get written before it gets too late.
Jon,
I love you baby. I'm going to get started on the other nightly story. I love you and I want to say thank you for everything today. This mornings conversation was very nice. I'm glad that we talked as openly as we did. It helped me out more than you know. I know you have no idea of my plans for our time together. I will just say that we are going to have a great time.
I miss you love,
Betty
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Tuesday Oct. 18th, 2011
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| My sweet husband Jon doing what he loves- computers. |
We had fun that day. Jon was able to try tomato dumplings. He liked them pretty well I think. I know the girls all loved them. I have missed having tomato dumplings for a long time. I really loved spending time with my relatives again. Having Jon and our girls there to share that with me was the best feeling. My new family meeting my old family. It was great.
I had hoped that my little brother would be there too but that turned out not to happen. Some day, I hope to be able to catch up with him. I haven't seen him in many years. I miss just being able to talk to him like I used to.
I'm learning there are a lot of things that I missed and still miss now. I never thought how empty my life was without family in it. I always thought that I was content in my life.Yeah boy was I wrong. Sometimes there is nothing better than having someone that knows you being around. I realize now that I missed feeling like I was a part of something. We didn't have a close family growing up. I didn't grow up around my aunt and uncle really. I saw them maybe a dozen times.
Having my new family has shown me how close family should be. I can't imagine my life without Jon, mom, dad, or the girls. They all fill my life full of happiness every day. I can't remember a time when I have laughed so much. I can't remember a time when I have felt happy before.
I can honestly say that I am happy. I don't think I ever have been before meeting this wonderful family. I feel blessed, I feel happy, I feel complete. Oh my goodness, I feel stuffed. We just finished eating dinner. We had pork chops and potato salad. Between eating and these babies, there is no more room left in the stable.
Jon,
I love you so very much. Thank you for everything you have helped me to become. You are the light at the end of my tunnel. Some days I wonder how I ever thought I was living before you came into my life. Then I realized I wasn't living, I was just existing. Since we met I am now living the life I always wanted. I'm happy, truly happy love. Life can't get much better than it has these last months.
I want you to know, you are my life. My reason for waking up everyday. You and our kids are my everything. I love you so much love.
Betty
Monday, October 17, 2011
Monday Oct. 17th, 2011
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| Jon and I Deployment Ceremony Day |
I love this picture even though it has that dark spot on it. It was taken on his Deployment Ceremony Day. I hated that he was leaving, but I was thrilled to see him again. It had only been two days since I had seen him. I was only about 4 weeks at the time. I looked huge already. I started showing early with this pregnancy. I am so glad that we had the girls taking these pictures. They are learning a little at a time how to take good pictures.
Today has been a little stressful. I had a lot of things to do today. I woke up late after not getting to bed til after four a.m. Less than five minutes after getting out of bed, Jon called me. It was great being able to hear his voice first thing in the morning. Then I had to run to Wal-Mart to pick up razor blades for Jon. Then back to the house I went to get them boxed up with some other things I had to ship him. Next it was off to the post office to get the package mailed off. Then back to the house to pick up negatives to take to Wal-Mart to have them put onto disk.
After that back home to wait two hours for Wal-Mart to get the DVD done. Then back to pick it up. Once back home I had three sets of pictures to go through that we have had taken over the last three months. Going through those was time consuming. I had to make sure that all pictures that I had in 5x7 size, I also had in 8x10 size. Mom gets the 5x7 and Jon and I keep the 8x10's. Then I had to make sure mom and dad both had wallet size of as many of the poses as I had wallets of.
After all of the pictures were taken care of, it was time to get back on my laptop to get things uploaded onto the external. It has been a long day, but everything is pretty much finished at this point. Now I am able to sit and breathe and try to get this post put up. Tomorrow is another long day. Girls school work, and getting as much printed for them as I can. That way they will have plenty to work on while I am on my little vacation.
Then since mom will be taking care of their school work while I'm gone, I will need to sit down with her and go over what I need them working on everyday. Somewhere in the middle of all of that, I need to find time to get my hair cut and colored. I'm going to have my hair short again. I have been putting it off because Jon likes it longer. Now it is just getting to long for me, and well lets face it at thirty seven I have more gray hair than I like. So coloring it is a necessary to do on my list.
It will be a busy day, but one that I am looking forward to. It means that my trip is getting closer. I am getting more excited by the day.
My dearest Jon,
I love you so very much. I can't wait for you to see my new hair color. It will be different than you are used to seeing me in. I know you aren't going to like how short my hair is going to be, but honestly I can't stand the length of it anymore. I hope that it doesn't upset you being that short. I do love you my sweet husband.
Betty
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Sunday Oct. 16th, 2011
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| Baby Bump |
Today was a long yet fun day. We went to Ponderosa for lunch. Afterwards we headed out shopping. I spent about $70 total but it was for things for my trip and some things I needed. Mom and I always have fun going shopping together. The girls had fun too. Lea and Boo were riding around on the electric cart with dad. I had to get after dad for making the girls get rowdy in the store. He thought it was funny. He likes to run people over with them too.
As for me, the highlight was the shopping trip. Of course the backache sucked afterward. It's getting harder to walk very much. The lower back kills when walking or standing for more than just a few minutes. Oh well that goes along with having babies. Love it and I wouldn't give it up for anything in the world.
As much as I hate the way I look when I am pregnant, I do enjoy being pregnant. There is nothing better in the world than feeling your baby moving for the first time. Men should have the ability to be pregnant. Then maybe they could understand just how special that feeling is.
Mom is about like Jon, they both think that pregnant women are beautiful. I think beautiful pregnant women are beautiful. I think average looking pregnant women are still just average. Mom has been enjoying taking belly pics. Jon loves seeing them. Me, well I'm just embarrassed that I am so huge with a ton of stretch marks. I know it goes along with having kids. But I could most certainly do without those horrible looking marks.
But that is a whole other rant. LOL
Jon,
I know I was quiet again tonight. I had so many things I was trying to get done at once. Downloads, mom's PSP leason lol, working on this blog, and trying to have a somewhat reasonable conversation on the phone. I promise to try to do better at holding a conversation while working on things. I love you so much my love.
Betty
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Saturday Oct. 15th, 2011
Well this has been one long day. No internet until just now. It's a long day without it. This post will be short tonight, hopefully the net won't go back out before I can publish the post.
I helped dad close off the front porch today, at least it keeps the wind out. It makes it a little warmer too. We're putting a heater out there to help with warmth too.
Jon has a funny sense of humor. he just took over my laptop as I am sitting here writing this post. All of a sudden my mouse went nuts. LOL Okay baby, I love you but not while I'm writing love. Oh how I can't wait to see you. I miss you so very much my love. I miss that sense of humor.
Well I am mostly packed. Just a few odd and end things that will have to wait until trip day. Not long now love.
I helped dad close off the front porch today, at least it keeps the wind out. It makes it a little warmer too. We're putting a heater out there to help with warmth too.
Jon has a funny sense of humor. he just took over my laptop as I am sitting here writing this post. All of a sudden my mouse went nuts. LOL Okay baby, I love you but not while I'm writing love. Oh how I can't wait to see you. I miss you so very much my love. I miss that sense of humor.
Well I am mostly packed. Just a few odd and end things that will have to wait until trip day. Not long now love.
Friday, October 14, 2011
Friday Oct. 14th, 2011
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| Baby bump |
Today has been a busy day. Plans are coming along nicely for my upcoming trip to Jon. With all the arrangements working out so well, I have finally let myself get excited about the trip. This will be the best four days of my life next to the days our daughters were born.
Car reservation made, hotel reservation confirmed, train tickets purchased. Now all I have left is to get packing. Well that and a crap load of laundry. I plan on packing being over by Monday except last minute things that I will pack the morning I leave.
I hate letting things go to the last minute. I still have plenty of time to get all the girls school work printed and gone over with grandma. Grandma; she is a life saver. I have no idea what I would do without her. She means so much to me. It's nice having someone here that takes such great care of the girls when I'm not home. I know that their school is in good hands with her.
As for me, well today I realized just how big these babies are making me get. Yeah four days between belly pictures and you can certainly tell the difference. I am going to be as big as a house when this pregnancy gets closer to the end. By the time I get to see Jon, he may very well want to turn around and run the other way with as big as I have gotten. Nah, I'm only teasing I know he will think I still look good (he just got new glasses and is still that blind!).
Today was a busy day for Jon as well. Even so, he still took a few minutes out of his busy schedule to call me. It's things like that, that show someone you care that makes all the difference in the world.
This post would have been earlier this evening had it not been for our internet being down. The company said it was something about one of the fiber optic lines being cut somehow. They said it would be at least six a.m. before it was fixed. Thank you goodness it is working now.
Jon my sweet love,
Just a short amount of time is left before I will be back in your arms. I am counting the days love. I hope that your day was at least tolerable. I love you so very much sweetheart. If you check out the baby bump pics page, you can see the picture mom took tonight. The difference is pretty darn visible. Those last two belly bump shots are just four little days apart.
I love you,
Betty
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Thursday Oct. 13th, 2011
Although at times I probably seem like all I do is put the Army down, that isn't what I intend to do at all. I understand the need of the US to have a military. I am proud of the men and women that serve this country. They each do what they do, I give them credit for that. They do something I would never be able to do. I respect that and I admire that.
So though it may seem like I am putting the military down, I am not. I do however disagree with how our government handles our service men and women. Our service people deserve only the best. At most our government offers them substandard. Our equipment is top notch, our troops are trained very well. However how the government treats our troops after they are home is a different story.
Each service member has given a great deal to protect our country. They should without any hesitation be treated so much better than they are for it. Our troops deserve the best medical care for life. They deserve the government that they protect to stand up for them. The government should make sure our troops current and retired have everything they need to continue to live well in the country they defend.
I worry that our troops are coming home with nothing to show for their bravery. I wish there was something we could all do to pitch in and make sure the troops are not coming home to nothing.
I've been thinking about this all day. I ended up more than a little depressed over the situation. So I thought why isn't more being done to help our troops. I'm going to think on this some more and see if I can't come up with some ideas. You never know what one person can figure out to do to help.
Jon my love,
I know I was quiet on the phone today. I have so many things floating around my mind. Tomorrow is a busy day for me too. Today is just a gloomy day. Cold and rainy makes Betty feel blah. It wasn't because of you or what you were doing while on the phone. I know you were working love. It was fine. I just feel down today. I really wish it were summer, at least then I could sit at our spot and feel closer to you. Last night it felt so good to see you on Skype. I miss that, just being able to see you smile. I love you so very much love.I really really do. I can't wait to be back in your arms again.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
Wednesday Oct. 12th, 2011
What makes a writer? What makes an author? Did you answer those two questions the same way? Most people will say that both are a person that writes. That is yet isn't true. An author most would agree is someone who has had at least one book published. So what the heck does this have to do with this blog?
I have been sitting here tonight trying to work on one of the five books that I have started already. I have interest from a publishing firm on one of the books. Yet that is not the one that I feel motivated to write as of right now. I have no desire to work on my paranormal fantasy books (either of them), I have no desire to work on my romance novel. My novel about domestic violence is coming along fairly nicely. My other book in progress, well that needs inspiration to get anywhere near. That inspiration has been evading me like the plague.
So where does that leave my in progress books? You guessed it, still sitting here on this hard drive. Instead I have been working on blogs. Yes, I did say blogs. I have this blog, another older blog, and a new blog that I just started last night. Not all of my writing is audience friendly though. You will not get a link to the other blog here on this site. The new one isn't kid friendly.
I have been having fun working on it since last night. I have it all nice and pretty, and after I get some more content on the blog I will open it to readers. For now, I want content on there first.
Today I had a great time out shopping. I am trying to get everything set up and in order for my trip. I don't like waiting until the last minute to start getting ready. The girls and I drove to Evansville Indiana to shop. We had a great time and little Boo had her ears pierced.
Jon,
I almost have everything I had planned on for our up coming visit. I can't wait to see you. Our time together is going to be memorable to say the least. I love you very much. I hope that you had a decent day. My day was fun. Boo looks so cute.
Betty
I have been sitting here tonight trying to work on one of the five books that I have started already. I have interest from a publishing firm on one of the books. Yet that is not the one that I feel motivated to write as of right now. I have no desire to work on my paranormal fantasy books (either of them), I have no desire to work on my romance novel. My novel about domestic violence is coming along fairly nicely. My other book in progress, well that needs inspiration to get anywhere near. That inspiration has been evading me like the plague.
So where does that leave my in progress books? You guessed it, still sitting here on this hard drive. Instead I have been working on blogs. Yes, I did say blogs. I have this blog, another older blog, and a new blog that I just started last night. Not all of my writing is audience friendly though. You will not get a link to the other blog here on this site. The new one isn't kid friendly.
I have been having fun working on it since last night. I have it all nice and pretty, and after I get some more content on the blog I will open it to readers. For now, I want content on there first.
Today I had a great time out shopping. I am trying to get everything set up and in order for my trip. I don't like waiting until the last minute to start getting ready. The girls and I drove to Evansville Indiana to shop. We had a great time and little Boo had her ears pierced.
Jon,
I almost have everything I had planned on for our up coming visit. I can't wait to see you. Our time together is going to be memorable to say the least. I love you very much. I hope that you had a decent day. My day was fun. Boo looks so cute.
Betty
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Tuesday Oct. 11th, 2011
For the last three days I have been sitting back reading the girls' blogs. Each time I sit back to read any of their blogs, I end up in tears. They just have a way of writing that really pulls a reader into the post. Our little Rose (who isn't so little anymore) has a way with words that not many authors have. I'm not the only sappy one around here. Her dad gets all teary eyed, her grandma does.
Lea is getting better at writing as well. I love the fact that she is at least trying her best to post everyday. That is more than I ever thought she would do. I'm just proud that she is at least trying.
My little Boo, is doing really well at learning how to type. This is her first year with using the keyboard on a computer. She's doing good so far except for the whole spelling thing.
Today was one of the rougher days. I spent about an hour and a half at our lake. That lake seems like it has magical powers. I can be in the worst depressed mood ever, go to the lake and in no time at all I am in a better mood. It's beautiful out there, quiet. It's also the first place that Jon and I ever went together. With Jon being gone sitting out at the lake helps me feel a little closer to him. In this time of deployment being close in the small ways are all that we have.
I love just sitting out at the lake or even the park where we first met. I can think back to that time, a time before the Army changed my life. I can think about a short amount of time that Jon and I really got to know one another. In the age of electronics we didn't meet online, we didn't only get to know each other through emails. We really sat and talked to one another face to face.
That is something about really getting to know someone because you have a lot of things in common. We learned from the first night that we have a lot in common. Having that chance to get to know him as well as we did that first few days, that is what made me know that I really have a deep connection with Jon. We just agree on so many life decisions about quite a few things. It's nice to not always be arguing over the simple things in life anymore.
I have done more than my fair share of arguing for no reason. When you aren't in love with the person you are with, there turns out to be more arguments. Arguments happen when one or the other or both aren't happy in their relationships. Until Jon and I met, I can honestly say, I was not happy. Now days since meeting Jon, I feel happier than I have ever felt.
Now I don't mean that as I have never been in love. I was, ONCE. It wasn't where I was supposed to be, if it had been I would have still been there. That is neither here nor there though. I know without a doubt that this is where I am meant to be. Here with Jon, in his arms and by his side is where I will always be. I love being here with the man that I know for a fact was chosen for me long before I ever met him. In that I have no doubt.
Jon,
Being with you has made me the happiest woman in the world. There is nowhere in this world that I would rather be. You have touched my life in a way that no one else ever has. You have given me reason to wake up every day. You have given me so much to look forward to.
You have shown the girls what a family is supposed to be. They never had that from anyone but me. You gave us all hope for the future. Hell you gave me my future when you gave us the lives of these twins. I love you so very much.
Betty
Lea is getting better at writing as well. I love the fact that she is at least trying her best to post everyday. That is more than I ever thought she would do. I'm just proud that she is at least trying.
My little Boo, is doing really well at learning how to type. This is her first year with using the keyboard on a computer. She's doing good so far except for the whole spelling thing.
Today was one of the rougher days. I spent about an hour and a half at our lake. That lake seems like it has magical powers. I can be in the worst depressed mood ever, go to the lake and in no time at all I am in a better mood. It's beautiful out there, quiet. It's also the first place that Jon and I ever went together. With Jon being gone sitting out at the lake helps me feel a little closer to him. In this time of deployment being close in the small ways are all that we have.
I love just sitting out at the lake or even the park where we first met. I can think back to that time, a time before the Army changed my life. I can think about a short amount of time that Jon and I really got to know one another. In the age of electronics we didn't meet online, we didn't only get to know each other through emails. We really sat and talked to one another face to face.
That is something about really getting to know someone because you have a lot of things in common. We learned from the first night that we have a lot in common. Having that chance to get to know him as well as we did that first few days, that is what made me know that I really have a deep connection with Jon. We just agree on so many life decisions about quite a few things. It's nice to not always be arguing over the simple things in life anymore.
I have done more than my fair share of arguing for no reason. When you aren't in love with the person you are with, there turns out to be more arguments. Arguments happen when one or the other or both aren't happy in their relationships. Until Jon and I met, I can honestly say, I was not happy. Now days since meeting Jon, I feel happier than I have ever felt.
Now I don't mean that as I have never been in love. I was, ONCE. It wasn't where I was supposed to be, if it had been I would have still been there. That is neither here nor there though. I know without a doubt that this is where I am meant to be. Here with Jon, in his arms and by his side is where I will always be. I love being here with the man that I know for a fact was chosen for me long before I ever met him. In that I have no doubt.
Jon,
Being with you has made me the happiest woman in the world. There is nowhere in this world that I would rather be. You have touched my life in a way that no one else ever has. You have given me reason to wake up every day. You have given me so much to look forward to.
You have shown the girls what a family is supposed to be. They never had that from anyone but me. You gave us all hope for the future. Hell you gave me my future when you gave us the lives of these twins. I love you so very much.
Betty
Monday, October 10, 2011
Monday Oct.10th, 2011
I just bought new maternity tops last week. This week, well they don't fit. I'm getting bigger by the day. Today I went and bought ten new tops. I love the new one I am wearing. It's comfortable, loose and our oldest daughters favorite color. I'm not usually too much into purple, but this top is nice.
The girls and I went shopping together. Guess what they had to keep showing me? Yep, you guessed it. Baby clothes. I kept telling them that, they still kept oohing and aahing over all the cute outfits. We had a blast. When the time comes to start buying things we are going to have so much fun.
Of course that's not including grandma or Aunt Diane and the fun they will be having with twins. If I ever get to actually hold the babies at all that will be awesome. Something tells me that may not happen. There are six other people here that will be constantly wanting to hold them. That doesn't count once Jon gets home too.
Anyway, just a short blog tonight. My hands are tired of me.
Jon,
I love you. Here is one picture that you asked me to keep sending you. I hope you enjoy it. (I don't LOL) It's in the Photo Gallery. Top Pic.
Betty
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